Evolution of Perception

Study of evolution reveals that the next generation is smarter than the previous generation. 

It becomes an established fact, when we realise in our early years, that we do know more than them- about technology, everything that is in, and everything that is not. We see them struggle with small or big issues and we in all our objectiveness, know the answers to ALL their problems. "Mummy, you should have been more assertive" or "You shouldn't have given up your career" or  "Why are you thinking about the past?- think about the present" and so on and so forth. Frustrated with them, we step out in the world as individuals with a solemn promise to the heart - I will be better. Thats phase one.

Second phase of wisdom starts when we unknowingly start to adopt their little habits or quoting a few well used favourite idioms/or singing their favourite songs. When you have kids is when you discover the horror of the fact that you ARE them - you start sounding and preaching like them too ! And then you get the joke of the generation, and with a smile you finally accept the fact with grace. You accept their wisdom, listen to them clearly, because you have finally realised that they are not wrong. They may be right. 

In order to explain the third phase- let me relate a recent incident.

One night, I got up at around 2 am- to realise that my daughter was burning up ! I woke my husband up and after noting down her temperature, we gave her an anti-pyretic and started sponging her face and neck to help body cool down. Even after 2 hours, there was no change. It was too soon to give her another dose of the medicine, and I started to panic. All sorts of scary, horrible scenarios began to pop up and spiral in my head. I counted minutes and every second was an hour long, until it was finally safe to give her another dose at 6 am. We did that and collapsed, hoping  the medicine to work and to catch up some sleep. Her body cooled down to normal temperature by 7 and I took a sigh of relief. It was the most horrific night of my whole life. In the morning I called up my dad and mum to share my horrible experience of the night. They were very sympathetic and said something so simple yet it changed my perspective forever. My father said, "Yes beta, its very very scary. You used to fall sick all the time with very high temperatures and we used to live in the middle of nowhere with no doctors or hospital close by and no google or internet. But somehow we did it, and look at you now. You will do it too."

That reminded me of the place we lived in - it really was in middle of nowhere, in the mountains- with not even another building structure in sight. No public transport or any other basic amenities. My father had crazy working hours so it was mostly just my mother. She raised 3 little children, who would fall sick and do all the other scary things that children do to scare the shit out of parents and she did it alone.

This realisation alone gives me so much moral support. My mum did it - I can do it too. She didn't have a cell phone handy to call her mum after a scary night as I do. She couldn't even let my father take the stress of it all because of the nature of the job he was in.  On the other hand - I have two sets of wonderful parents just a phone call away and I have a wonderful husband who is still working regular hours. Our parents have gone through so many different challenges and have overcome so much.  

We SHOULD be better if nothing then at least by the virtue of the facilities of technology we avail these days. But I'll count me lucky if I even reach to become as good as my parents. That's stage three of my evolution of perception.

They say- only a mother can understand another mother. And now I understand her and her choices much better than when I was a teenager bursting with opinions and quick solutions. 

Sitting here and now- if I could travel back in time- I would give the biggest warmest tightest hug to that 32 year old lady in the house, alone in the mountains with her 3 little children. 

Since I cannot really do that- I just call her up.